Once as a young girl I had a conversation with my mom about trust, and I likened the process of opening up to a rose. I offered the notion that in order to bloom, the rose needed to know it was secure (safe) in having its needs met- water and sun. The bud in its varying stages of opening was learning and growing, and would eventually open if the circumstances were correct. The rose in bloom was sure of itself and its ability to have the needs met, it was open and beautiful. It seemed so simple then, a rose was either a bud or in bloom.
In my youth, I thought the idea of a single rose was all-encompassing; you were either a bud or fully open. All or nothing, open or learning to be, trusting or getting there; the concept that you could be both open and closed never occurred to me. As I sit here now, I’m shaking my head at my own naivety.
Don’t get me wrong, I still love the premise of a rose in its varying stages being symbolic of relations with others and the degree to which we are open. Instead of a single rose though, I feel as if a rose bush is more fitting. As people, we’re not one dimensional, not by a long shot. It stands to reason then, that we can be buds in some areas of our lives while in full bloom in others.
As I look at my own rosebush, I see quite the tale. Sure there are a few roses that are fragrant and open, beautiful in all that they are. However, if you look closer just beyond the sprawling and colorful petals of the roses in bloom, you’ll see there’s more to the story. There are several buds in various stages of opening, some reaching out a petal or two to test the waters; there’s another that is wrapped so tightly it might as well be in a cocoon. Others have petals hanging on despite the fact that their time to shine may have come to pass. There are petal-less stems just standing, as the only evidence that beauty once existed here. In a few places too, there are rosehips, the fruit and seed left behind by a blossom- the lessons as it were.
My aim this week is to nurture some of those buds tenderly, to have conversations that need to be had in an attempt to provide the right circumstances for things to bloom- even if it scares me. I plan to take stock, and find ways in which I can best support what is already in bloom. I will also take out the sheers and deadhead what is no longer serving me and taking away energy, creating a fresh space for new growth to happen.
Wish me luck!